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There is no normal: A holiday divorce mantra

by | Dec 4, 2019 | Divorce

Even in modern America, it is not unusual for the holiday season to be idealized. Sometimes, it seems like every commercial on television shows the perfect family enjoying a perfect holiday, and parents may feel unreasonable pressure to live up to this unrealistic representation. For New Jersey families that have gone through divorce, parents may be discouraged when things don’t work out as planned. 

A recent editorial gave a firsthand account of a mother’s holiday frustration. Years ago, she and the father of her children divorced. Both parents had moved on, and though the mother had remarried, she was able to maintain an open line of communication with her ex-husband so that the children were able to enjoy time with both parents. When bad weather put a sudden hitch in holiday plans, the children’s father suggested she drop the kids off to celebrate with his family.

Naturally wanting her children to have an enjoyable holiday, she made her way to the next state to drop them off with their father. After waving goodbye to the kids, the mother and her current husband were dismayed to realize that they themselves would have to plan their holiday on the fly. After searching for restaurants that were not closed for the holiday or due to inclement weather, the pair found themselves perusing the menu at a popular breakfast chain. 

The mother explains that, at first, she was dismayed that she and her husband would not have a normal holiday, as it were, and she decided to look on the bright side and be glad that her children would have a nice day. This serves as a reminder that when it comes to divorce, there is no “normal,” and putting undue stress on oneself to live up to preconceived notions can ruin the chance to experience something new. After a divorce, some things must inevitably change, but with a deep breath and a bit of levity, a person can let go of unreasonable expectations and move forward. If a person needs help with a divorce in New Jersey, an experienced family law attorney is a good resource.