Once you know you are getting divorced, there are a few practices you may want to start pulling back on. Living in a digital age makes it easy for people to put life on display for prying eyes. One of the worst things you can do before, during and even after divorce is putting things in writing you may regret.
While engaging with your ex via text message, social media or email seems like a good idea, there is one very big downside: a written record. Try and stay away from negative exchanges with your ex, especially in writing.
Social media missteps
Is posting about what your family does on a regular basis pretty common? Once the family dynamic changes, you should think twice before disclosing everything. Social media posts are ammunition in divorces across the country, especially in those with hotly contested issues such as property division and child custody.
Texts and emails
Your attorney may advise you to communicate with your spouse in writing. The main reason is probably to maintain accurate documentation. Communicating regarding kids’ schedules and financial matters is best done via email or text message; however, these exchanges can turn ugly and be used against you.
The test
Before hitting send on any message, ask yourself: Is this something that a judge can read? It may be a tough test to administer, but the alternative is sending something you cannot take back. In New Jersey, a judge may review any written communication between spouses or third-party exchanges about the proceedings. Depending on the content, it may not be favorable.
Divorce is such a highly volatile situation that being extra cautious with not only what you say, but how you say it, may become difficult. There are times when stress and aggravation may boil over, and you may have a momentary lapse of judgment. It is important to eliminate any kind of hostility or nastiness from your writing. Failing to do so may result in the court looking unfavorably upon you and your side of the story.