Marlton Family Law Blog

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What you put in writing may come back to haunt you

When couples call it quits, emotions and tensions run increasingly high. Even before the process begins, many of these same spouses have begun to uncouple emotionally and even physically.

The higher the stakes in a divorce, the higher the pressure and stress. Anger and frustration abound when things do not go one way or the other, and you may want to express your feelings to your former partner. However, keep in mind that anything you say, especially in writing, may cost you dearly at a later time.

Stay away from email and text messaging

The popularity of smartphones has made staying in touch with someone in one of many different ways more accessible than ever. These same means that keep two old friends close across the miles can help you come apart during a stressful divorce. You may decide to send a text detailing your disdain and disgust for your former partner. Even if what you want to say is valid, resist the urge to hit send. Whatever you put in writing via email, text messaging or even social media can come back as evidence against you during the court proceedings. Something you said in the heat of the moment eight months ago could get you in big legal trouble now.

Do not respond in the same manner

On the flipside, if your ex is one to fly off the handle in writing, you may want to return fire. Instead, consider one of these:

  1. Do not respond at all. Your ex may attempt to use your response against you.
  2. Respond in a very professional and nonconfrontational way. While this is difficult, it proves you do not have the same level of hostility.
  3. Save the message for your attorney. Proving that your ex is not emotionally stable or has anger control problems is easier when you have evidence.

Resisting the urge to have a text message war with your soon-to-be ex is difficult at times. However, the reward may come in the form of a better advantage when it comes time to face the judge.